Julie here… today is my birthday. I’ve put a lot of hype into turning 28. For years now I’ve been saying that 28 is the best age to be… so here I am… 28… let’s see what’ll happen next…
A few months ago I sent out three adoption grant applications. I didn’t know how likely it would be that we would actually get one, but you never know unless you try. A couple months ago we got our first “sorry” letter in the mail. Oh well, two more to go. Last night when I got home I saw a letter from Show Hope. This is the organization started by Steven Curtis Chapman and his wife to help couples fund their adoptions. Honestly I thought the letter was probably junk mail. When I opened it I had to read the end of the first paragraph 3 times. Then I had my dad read it just to make sure I was reading it correctly. “We are pleased to inform you that you have been approved to receive an adoption grant in the amount of $4,000.”
WHAT?!? $4,000 is a lot of money… I couldn’t believe it. I would have been thrilled with a couple hundred. That puts us just a little over a thousand dollars away from our goal of $30,000.
I told Alan that if we end up with more than our original goal we can just save it towards our next adoption. 😉
Praise God! Now we just need a referral call!
Sometimes I’m embarrassed to be white. Most of the time I don’t have to think about the color of my skin, but every now and then… I have to take a look around our world and think about how I want to be perceived. This may be taboo to talk about, but part of me is not looking forward to picking up our kids in Ethiopia. Don’t get me wrong… I’m thrilled to travel half way across the world. I’m excited to see another culture and spend a few weeks (before we pick up the kiddos) getting to know the land and the people… the part that I’m not looking forward to is being just another white couple coming over to pick up their black babies and save them from a life of starvation and disease.
This really bothers me.
I LOVE adoption and believe that everyone should be involved in it in one way or another. I HATE the image of the white man coming to save the day. I can’t do anything about the fact that I’m white… I don’t want to… I don’t hate white people… this stereotype just bothers me.
When I used to go to Russia every year I always tried to blend in with the people. When I walked down the street I smiled less… not because I was unhappy, but because Russians don’t smile when they’re walking down the road. I tried to stay at the edge of the American group I might be with that week because I didn’t want anyone to know I was with them. I just wanted to be perceived as another Russian walking down the street. I’d use my limited Russian to seal my identity even more. It’s not that I was ashamed of being American or wouldn’t tell people I was if asked… it’s just that I find large groups of Americans visiting foreign countries to be quite annoying. We’re loud and take too many pictures and goof around on the subway… it’s embarrassing really… so I pretended to be Russian and I felt a connection with the people there…
I think it might be a little harder to blend in in Ethiopia… our skin will give us away immediately that we’re not from around here. Getting back on the plane with two Ethiopian children has the potential to make us look like just another couple who is coming to take something away from their country.
I really don’t mean to sound negative in this post. I’m sooooo excited to be adopting from Africa. I’m so excited for other families who have adopted or are in the process right now… I’m just confused as to what I’m supposed to do about this image that bothers me so much…
P.S. I wish I knew how long the wait was going to be… I want to meet our kids so bad!!
Today we have officially been on the wait list for 3 months. Since we are adoption siblings we have no idea how long the wait will be. I talked before about how I’m torn between wanting to get the kids now and wanting them to have as much time in Ethiopia as possible. I trust that God’s timing is the best and that the kids will come to us in the right time.
I have been looking forward to 2010 for a while. This is the year that we will become parents. In just a few weeks I will turn 28 (the perfect age). I’ve long believed that 28 was the perfect age… for a few reasons… 1. You’re old enough for people to take you seriously as an adult… 2. You’re still young enough to be hip and cool. 🙂 See, my logic is amazing… so, since I will finally be 28 here in 2010… and I will become a mother… I believe this is going to be an amazing year.
I’m excited that we have 3 months down already… and even though I don’t know how much longer the wait will be, I know we will meet our children this year… and my 10 year dream of adopting will finally be a reality.